This Father’s Day, I celebrate Dads as builders! I revel in those fathers who built buildings, large families, Turbines, farms, and all of us up to love! Amidst all the tearing down recently in our country, it is time for us Fathers to build up! Here are four examples of Fathers building up.
1. Building a family with bricks and good earth. My Father-In-Law, along with his wife, built a loving family of 10 borne on bricks, love, and good Minnesota earth. The first time I met Cal, he took me to his Raspberry farm to work and to talk about his tractor. This was the same raspberry patch my wife and her nine siblings learned responsibility each summer. Later, Cal took me to see the buildings he built as a Union Bricklayer. As we talked, I appreciated how he built a family, brick by brick, berry by berry. A man of few words, his example spoke volumes.
2. Building engines that power cities, civil life, and a family. My father, Big-D, was a dynamo! Like the turbines that he built at his work, Big-D energized civil life and a family through respect and love. He was a Union Vice President, a Cub Master, a baseball coach, and president of several civic organizations. He taught me and the community how to throw a curve ball, build a car for the Pinewood Derby, and negotiate to get what a worker needs and deserves. Countries are built on civic organizations, not tweets! Read more here (American Anthem: More Crosswicks less Crosswise ). Dad, along with my mother, taught us how to live, love, and learn in a community.
3. Building in the background with humility and hard work. God is the ultimate father as a builder. He built heaven and this good earth, which we are called to protect. And when God selected an earthly father to protect and teach his only Son, he selected St. Joseph. A quiet, humble man, Joseph patiently taught the Son of Man how to build amongst humanity with his hands and heart. Joseph stood in the background and let his work show forth through the works of the Son. Joseph prayed and sent a path for what all good Fathers wish for their Sons; a life that eclipses their own and sets the world aright.
4. Building bridges of love. My first three examples are no longer walking in physical form with us. But I know that their example lives on, teaching us to build bridges of love across all humanity. I see the builder in the young fathers I come in contact with in my work and ministries. Getting up at night to comfort a little one and waking up early each morning to work each day just a little sleep deprived. And I remember how hard it is to be a builder, cheer as their families grow in love, and serve as an example to all of us that love knows no bounds.
A Father’s love knows no boundaries. It builds up instead of tears down. It builds bridges across humanity and through time! It is color blind and love rich. Let’s all be builders in our families and society!
Christmas is meant for community. We are brought together each year by the light that came into the world. This joy is to be shared among friends, family, and neighbors!
I decided to write this blog after seeing several pictures of my old hometown from my childhood and current friend, Katherine Caldwell. Other pictures are in the video at the end, also produced by Katherine Caldwell with a new song to an old tune from me. But the one below of Main Street blanketed in snow got me dreaming of Christmas in Crosswicks.
Crosswicks in Snow image by Katherine Caldwell
I never tire of thinking of Christmas in my hometown. The snow glistening in the trees. The 100+ year old Christmas tree bursting into light! Neighbors singing Christmas Carols around a bonfire and later warming themselves with hot apple cider. The candlelight service in the 200-year-old Quaker Meeting House. There are four main reasons Christmas in Crosswicks is special and makes the holiday shine brighter.
1. Christmas in Crosswicks is Historic! Crosswicks was settled by Quaker immigrants back in 1677. Christmas celebrations and worship have been ongoing ever since. The Quaker Meeting House that still stands and holds the annual Candlelight service each Christmas was built in 1773. This years’ service went virtual except for the musicians due to COVID on Dec. 20, keeping the tradition unbroken.
The Christmas of 1776 is particularly noteworthy. Crosswicks was occupied by Colonial troops of General Cadwallader in preparation for the historic Battle of Trenton which one of the turning points of the Revolutionary War.
I am also proud that despite Covid, Crosswicks celebrated the 101st lighting of the large Christmas tree that sits in the Quaker fields near the Community House. To see the magic, look at this link for this year’s virtual ceremony. Crosswicks Christmas Tree Lighting.
One last historic Christmas moment relates to a historic building that was three buildings down from my home. Brick’s Mincemeat Factory was built in 1879 and until 1968 was the state’s largest producer of mincemeat. It is now a historical building but still holds special memories of the mincemeat pies we had each Christmas. Read more here – Brick’s Mincemeat Factory
The historic nature of Christmas in Crosswicks makes it special but not necessarily unique. I encourage all in this unprecedented year to learn more about the history of your town related to Christmas.
2. Sharing of Faith and Fellowship. Crosswicks had diversity when it comes to faith and denomination. I already mentioned that the city was founded by Quakers and the Candlelight service at the Quaker Meeting House is a fixture of the holiday season. But one of the things that I remember most about the holiday season is learning about Hanukkah at my elementary school each year. I still remember the dreidel song taught to us by one of my friend’s mother. Also, that Hanukkah was the Festival of Light represented by the menorah.
We also had the United Methodist Church which was attended by my good friend. I would sing with her father, a retired Methodist minister, songs like Go Tell it on the Mountain that we did not normally sing in my Catholic Church. We also had the historic Grace African Methodist Episcopal Church organized in 1868 located 3 buildings down the street from my house. The church was the first African American denomination organized and incorporated in the United States. I remember the Christmas hymns of joy echoing forth from the Church. We of Crosswicks were of different faiths and denominations but we shared our beliefs and joy openly during the season
3. Joining in Civil Community. We also joined each holiday season in civil community. Each year our family joined our fellow “Crosswicksians” in the annual bonfire and Christmas Tree lighting. We would all circle the tree at the Community Center and sing Christmas Carols both secular and religious. Voices rising together as one community we sang of hope and love! Later we drank hot apple cider and ate donuts as we shared fellowship about the encroaching holiday Season. To close the day, Santa Claus would ride on the back of the firetruck and toss candy to all of us. It was all a kid could want!
4. Exploring the Wonders of Winter with Friends. After all that candy, cider, and donuts, we needed an outlet to burn off the calories. Our rural town (imagine that in Jersey) offered a wealth of options in the winter month. No Netflix for us! We grabbed our skates and went skating on the Frog Pond behind the library or better, yet we sled down “the Hill” behind the old Firehouse. I remember leaving the house at 8 am on some days and not returning until 9 PM. The only break would be a grape soda and some candy at Applegate’s Market.
We even exercised when getting our Christmas Trees. No Papa Noel’s or Walmart for us. We went with our Dad to cut down a tree at Nicholson’s Tree Farm. I am envious of my cousin since she still lives down the street.
In closing, Christmas in Crosswicks was full of faith, fellowship and fun. That is why some forty years later, I am still dreaming of Christmas in the Crosswicks. You may be dreaming of Christmas in your hometown. Christmas in the year of Covid just feels different from those of the past. We are asked to remain apart and not to congregate. And when we are not standing apart, we are sometimes ripping each other apart with cutting remarks.
For all, the light of Christmas may seem a bit dimmer this year. And, despite our best efforts to set our homes alight like the Griswold’s, we cannot capture the brightness of a smile or the warmth of a human touch. Light does not come from a bulb! Rather it comes from hearts joined with the joy of Christmas!
I think God and nature conspired to replicate the Christmas star this Solstice, 2020 to remind us that when two planets conjoin their lights, the heavens are brighter. Let us conspire, like my neighbors in Crosswicks, to virtually cross our wicks to bring the light of hope! Let us share the spark of humanity with each other to break the isolation of Covid and the rancor of rivalry!
We may not be able to be together in real time this year, but we can strive to be together virtually. Reach out to old friends on Zoom. Say a prayer for someone in need. Donate to a charity. And most of all honor the light that has come into the world with worship and kindness for all. And until next year, I am dreaming of Christmas in Crosswicks. Let me close with a song.
The lyrics are below:
Photos by Katherine Caldwell, lyrics and sung by Don Grier to tune of White Christmas
Christmas in Crosswicks
I am dreaming of Christmas in Crosswicks,
Just like the ones I used to know,
Where people got together,
In all kinds of weather,
To watch the Christmas tree aglow!
I am dreaming of Christmas in Crosswicks,
And the bonfires in the night,
May all your memories be bright,
And when we cross the wicks with neighbors, we bring more light!
Two songs sung by two Elvis’s are my go-to’s during this Pandemic. Both speak of driving through hard times with hope around the corner. They acknowledge the pain while seeking the future. And my favorite part. You can belt them out with a beer in hand after a hard day.
The first one is from that other Elvis, and truth be told my favorite Elvis – Elvis Costello. Unlike his other hits, he did not write this one (Nick Lowe did) but Elvis does the best rendition – “(What’s So Funny ‘Bout) Peace, Love And Understanding” . For you have not hear it, here is the official version https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ssd3U_zicAI.
I once listened to this song on repeat at least 20 times after a hard week. The first verse and the chorus tell the story:
“As I walk through this wicked world Searchin’ for light in the darkness of insanity I ask myself, “Is all hope lost? Is there only pain and hatred and misery?”
And each time I feel like this inside There’s one thing I wanna know What’s so funny ’bout peace, love and understanding? What’s so funny ’bout peace, love and understanding?” Lyrics Nick Lowe
Every time I read a friend attacking another friend on Facebook in some political fight or hear about the loss of another brave soul I ask myself the same question in the first verse. But then catch myself and realize that the peace, love, and understanding lies within me. Our soul longs for peace. We just need to cling to it and understand that everyone carries pain. It is up to you to bring inner peace, to show love to your friends and enemies, and understand the pain and hope of others. Rise to the occasion, extend a hand and be the peacemaker.
The second song is by the THE Elvis – Elvis Presley. This song was sung for the first time in Elvis’s Comeback Concert in 1968 at the end. It was written by Walter Earl Brown and came 2 months after Martin Luther King’s assassination. It also contains some MLK quotes. Only 5 at the time, I still remember it. Here are some of the words.
“There must be lights burning brighter somewhere Got to be birds flying higher in a sky more blue If I can dream of a better land Where all my brothers walk hand in hand Tell me why, oh why, oh why can’t my dream come true,
Oh why.
There must be peace and understanding sometime Strong winds of promise that will blow away the doubt and fear If I can dream of a warmer sun Where hope keeps shining on everyone Tell me why, oh why, oh why won’t that sun appear
We’re lost in a cloud With too much rain We’re trapped in a world That’s troubled with pain But as long as a man Has the strength to dream He can redeem his soul and fly”
The Elvis’s sang the truth! What’s so funny ‘bout peace, love, and understanding? Absolutely NOTHING! Is there a light shining brighter somewhere? It is in our grasp. If we choose to live, love, learn and lead!
I have hope in Hamilton! I have hope in humanity! I have hope in the USA!
This July 4th I watched patriotic, uplifting musicals from dawn to dusk. Hamilton, followed by Sound of Music, followed by Hamilton, followed by Yankee Doodle Dandy, followed by Hamilton yet again. Here are five reasons Hamilton is quintessential American, quintessential human, and resonates and resounds.
1. Hamilton is a work of staggering genius! I love anyone who can take a tome like Chernow’s Hamilton and turn it into a work of artistic genius. Do not get me wrong. I read Chernow’s Hamilton from cover to cover and as a history buff, I loved it. But how Lin Manuel could turn that book into 20+ songs ranging from rap (Hamilton, Not Giving Away My Shot, etc.) to ballad (Quiet Uptown, Burn) to Pop Song (Helpless, Schuyler Sisters, Wait for It), to Broadway classic (All King George songs) is beyond me. And just so you do not think I am confining to my enthusiasm to this blog. I stood up at the beginning of intermission at Hamilton and embarrassed my kids by shouting “This is a work of staggering genius!”. This got some head turns but mainly high fives from those around me. Lin Manuel is a modern-day Shakespeare! So, take that CNN!
2. Immigrants, we get the job done! This country was built by immigrants. Hamilton is the prototypical immigrant, who built this country. He was young, scrappy and hungry, and refused to give away his shot! My Great Grandfather Charles Henry came here during the Irish Potato famine and built a life in the US. He built a life by the sweat of his brow and love of this country. One thing I will always remember is he tried to enlist at the age of 50+ during WW II and was denied due to his age! My great uncles fought with Patton in WW II. We are a country of immigrants that get the job done! Read my blog from a past July 4th on the topic here: America the Beautiful But Broken: A Prescription and a Promise (Re-post)
3. “The arc of the moral universe is long, but it bends toward justice.” I get the gist of the CNN critique of Hamilton. Yes, the founding fathers punted on the question of slavery. But I do not agree that they should not be celebrated. Washington, Jefferson, Hamilton and others set in motion this fundamental truth. “We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness.” They were men of their times but had the moral courage to set in motion a belief that resounds through history. We as humans are fallible. But as humanity we progress. Only when we forget the creator, and the fact that there is something that bonds us together beyond the color of our skin do we diverge from the arc of justice. Fight for the arc! Bend, love and do not break.
4. Diversity in opinion, breeds innovation and progress. One thing that really resonated in Hamilton was the diversity. The play had diversity of race, but I am talking about the diversity in opinion of our founding leaders. I absolutely love the diversity expressed in the Cabinet Battles and the whole play. We are free to express our divergent opinions in the USA. They drive us forward, even at times we may take a step back. But please in Civil Discourse not in duels. Barbara Jordan taught me Civil Discourse Ms. Jordan’s Lessons on Civil Discourse No more Quiet Uptowns. Let us resound the valleys and peaks with liberty and love!
5. Last reason is personal. I love Hamilton. I love the genius of our nation. That despite the fallibility of human nature, that we progress. We love. We wallow in angst but lead. I love this country with all its flaws but most of all its genius. I HAVE HOPE IN HAMILTON!!!!!!
